Define: vacation

B and I have an ongoing discussion. He persists in calling the trips we take as a family, vacations. To me, they may be many things, but vacation is not one of them. Packing up a family of 5 (one who's under a year old and one who has severe food allergies) to go anywhere, takes a Herculean effort. Add to that, these vacations usually start with 8+ hours in a car. All. Together. Did I mention 8 hours?

Merriam-Webster defines vacation as:

1 : a respite or a time of respite from something :
INTERMISSION. 2 a : a scheduled period during which activity
(as of a court or school) is suspended b : a period of
exemption from work granted to an employee for rest and relaxation. 3 : a period spent away from home or business in travel or recreation vacation at the beach. 4 : an act or an instance
of vacating

Do you see the words rest and relaxation in those definitions? Yeah. Me too. Rest and relaxation are two words that are nowhere to be found on our family vacations.

Vacations to me do not consist of the following:
-kids
-driving
-wiping of bums, noses, or boo-boo's
-diapers, no wipes, no diaper creme, no Batman toothbrushes, no Johnson & Johnson's Baby Wash
-coolers stuffed with Yo-Baby, Danimals, sippy cups of chocolate milk
-totes filled with granola, Wheat Thins, graham crackers and Twizzlers
-portable DVD players
-Veggie Tales movies
-5:30 a.m. wake-up calls

They DO consist of the following:
-beds that are made magically while I'm cavorting
-drinks that appear mysteriously in my hands
-delicious meals that are prepared for me, again while I'm out cavorting
-any place I make a mess, someone else cleans it up

In short, my idea of a vacation looks a lot like my kids' vacations. The difference being that my kids live in this lap of luxury 24/7 365 days a year.